Annoying Volturi
By Gwen and Katti
+ Nick one of the Volturi standards and run through Volterra with it whilst screaming "There are vampires in the city!!"
+ Scream loudly whenever Jane looks at you.
+ Pretend to punch Renata but stop your hand 5cm from her face. Express wonder and general amazement extremly loudly.
+ Beg Demetri for a game of Hide and Seek then throw a temper tantrum each time he finds you in under a minute.
+ Act blind, deaf and mute whenever Alec is in the same room as you.
+ Offer them steak and garlic for dinner.
+ Have an open air ABBA concert outside their windows.
+ Write on Aro's diary/journal/book of torture victims/robes of state/bedroom walls "I LOVE JANE"
+ Ask Caius if his hair is dyed.
+ Ask Alec if Jane is really his sister.
+ Set up a stall at Volterra's gates.
+ Sell the tourists garlic wreaths and garlic shaped fridge magnets and badges saying "I've been to Volterra!"
+ Convince the tourists to reinact a seige against Volterra.
+ Give Marcus an immortal child called Didyme.
+ Buy them all pink fluffy pens
+ Strut around the castle humming the Addams Family theme tune.
+ Do a 60-minute-makeover on the castle.......
+ ..... Decorate everything in retro.
+ Insist everyone wears hippy outfits.
+ Act mortally offended and throw a tantrum if they refuse to do or like anything on the above list.
The Volturi wish to neither confirm or deny any above allegations. Anyone stupid enough to try anything out will suffer a most painful demise.....